And here comes my thoughts....

So today my heart and my mind are a little uneasy. You see, sometimes I get frozen in fear and that's kind of where I am at today. We are ok, I am trusting in God, it's just I lose site of Him sometimes and the fact that He has us right where we need to be. God doesn't promise an easy road, but if we trust in Him-He will lead. God has been leading us for quite sometime in the area of work. We truly feel God has opened the door for Day 3 Productions and for Jeff to pursue his passions, it's just a really scary place. And so to be honest, the fear has gotten the best of both of us in the past week and Satan is using this weakness to come in and jumble up our trust in the Lord. You see with any new company, there are no guarantees. How long do you give it-sometimes it takes 3-5 years for a company to truly get up and running. What do you do in the meantime? The bills are still there and try as I might I can't just make them disappear with the wave of a wand. We are ok right now. It's just scary when you don't know what the future holds, how you will pay the bills in months to come. So last night Jeff and I just prayed about it, that we would trust in the good times and the trying times that God has us where we need to be. That we would not let the lies of Satan or fear overcome us. That we would trust in God's truth-that He loves us, He calls us His children and He will continue to carry us along as we juggle through this thing called life. So today is another day-I am not going to let the fear overcome, I am going to put my faith in these verses-"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." Romans 12:12 (thanks Deb-so glad you posted this verse today, it was so encouraging).

Something else that's been bothering me and I think it goes hand in hand with what I mentioned above-I always am wanting more-I want a bigger house, I want to be home with Cale and get frustrated when I hear of others that get to stay home, and just easily get jealous of what other people have or how they seem to have it easier than us. I don't often enough just sit back in wonder of all the Lord has provided: a beautiful, healthy baby boy, an amazing husband who works so hard to provide for this family, a great house and roof over our head, cars that work, 2 cute (even though they are annoying sometimes) puppies to snuggle with, an amazing network of family and friends to encourage and support us, my mother willing to watch our child and help us out with saving daycare costs, enough money to always pay the bills (and I mean just enough sometimes), a job for me with amazing benefits for my family, a church family to grow with and learn from, and a God that no matter what my shortcomings are loves me unconditionally. These are the things that I need to focus on when the lies start to come into my head like "You need more, bigger house, etc.", "Look at all those other moms staying home with their kids" and other lies.

As the old hymn Trust and Obey goes:
Stanza 1:
When we walk with the Lord
In the light of His word,
What a glory He sheds on our way!
While we do His good will,
He abides with us still,
And with all who will trust and obey.

Refrain:
Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.

Stanza 2:
Not a burden we bear,
Not a sorrow we share,
But our toil He doth richly repay;
Not a grief or a loss,
Not a frown or a cross,
But is blest if we trust and obey.

(Refrain)

Stanza 3:
But we never can prove
The delights of His love
Until all on the altar we lay;
For the favor He shows
For the joy He bestows
Are for them who will trust and obey.

(Refrain)

Stanza 4:
Then in fellowship sweet
We will sit at His feet
Or we'll walk by His side in the way;
What He says we will do,
Where He sends we will go;
Never fear, only trust and obey

(Refrain)

And I will end this long post here. May you trust today wherever the Lord has you, whether good or bad, whether pain, loss, or joy that He has you in His hand-just trust and obey.